The Lucky Guru

Man is busy fighting the fears of experiencing pain and sorrow, more than finding happiness. He would pounce at just about anything, that will protect him from his seemingly inescapable blues. He may not have sex for the sake of it, but only to assure himself, that he is happy and still going strong. He in fact plans about the next round of sexual activities, even as the present one going.

Besides own up a big patch of earth, endless list of people to rescue, in times of trouble, loads of money to buy everything that can kick his sorrows away, fiercely fought beliefs, that can cover up his hidden fears, he may choose to get little spiritual too. Perhaps a god father with a wand in the hand, accessible to him round the clock, to hide behind or 'climb shoulders' for a piggy back ride, who can wield that shield for him, to make his life felt safer and well protected.

BG(Bored Guru)meets up with many on a daily basis, but few remain fresh in his memory. If BG was in to the 'deeksha giving' tradition, he would have named our hero of today's post as 'sunshine'. Because our friend brought so much of exuberance with him, wherever he went. He can tickle the funny bone, even in the worst situations, and turn everyone to ripples of laughter. A smooth talker, and a joker in the pack, more importantly a graduate in metallurgical engineering, he had earned the endearment of BG in many ways. Nevertheless, BG did not fail to see his hidden fears about life, every time he came to visit.

While his flirtations outside the marriage was/is never known to his wife and children, as they were busy with their own chores, he had nothing much to do in life, except try out his luck on everything that came under his nose. He sat on a huge property, inherited from his father, as the only son, has been blowing it away on booze and babes.

He visits BG on several occasions to rub shoulders, hoping to catch up with some 'divine luck' to favor his onward journey in life. One middle of afternoon, he called BG on the phone and announced, "I'm going to buy your flight ticket this time and don't tell me its not possible". BG's flight expenses are usually met from the sale money of his CDs and books.

BG got little bit curious about this sudden charitability of sunshine and said "its ok, the ticket has been already done". Sunshine replied, "In any case, I want to come to the airport, like last time to pick you up". The unsuspecting BG agreed to the idea. And then came the twist. He was almost clandestine when he said, "keep the boarding pass with you safe, it may be needed" He sounded like the ground staff at airport, who said similar things, as you were about to catch a connecting flight.

On occasions BG had enquired Mr.Sunshine, if he ever understood the teachings of BG. Pat came the reply always, "I don't care about what you teach, as long as you are there with me". BG had counter questioned several times, "then what draws you near me?". Sunshine usually replied, "I dont know, but I feel very safe, when I'm with you?". Sometimes, he would set his throat and say on top of his voice, "I dont expect any enlightenment or moksha and all that stuff from you, I just want your hand on my head, thats about it".

Sunshine can fit in any spiritual org with his manners, and lack of spiritual knowledge. BG always thought, sunshine would be a great asset, if he was in some 'happening' org, high in the ranks of an organizing committee, as there is a lot of shrewed talking to be done. Most people actively involved in organizing committees, of any guru worth the headlines, usually is untouched by any spiritual wisdom.

On the day of BG's flight to sunshine's hometown, there was a reminder call about boarding pass. BG felt intrigued, but thought this must be some trick sunshine was pulling. As BG stepped out of the airport, sunshine waved hands with a shrewed and eager smile, as couple of others were waiting too. After certain ritualistic greetings done, sunshine almost leaned over and in to BG's ears and whispered, "If I get the boarding pass(tear away remaining of the boarding pass), I can leave now and come and meet you later on."

He wanted to push off from the scene in a hurry, if boarding pass landed in his hand. But BG suddenly said in a stern voice "unless you explained, I cant handover". He did not expect that sudden revolt and almost shyed away saying "Guruji, I will meet you later when you are free" and left the lounge quickly. In the late night, he came to the place where BG stayed, sat down somewhat restlessly. When he started speaking, there was a faint odour of alcohol, "I want that boarding pass, if you dont mind'.

BG said "I will give you right away, if you tell me why you want it?" He set his throat in his usual style, "Don't get angry but I will buy the lotto (lottery) based on your boarding pass number". He did not fail to tickle even at that moment. BG was curious to know how it worked that way. Sunshine smiled and said, "it worked last time, I had seen your boarding pass number and bought the lottery, believe me, I won a big amount". He was like a child, of some ten years old.

BG told him, "I hand over the boarding pass number now, and if this time, the number did not work, you promise me now, you will never buy lottery again". If not vedanta, if not brahma sutras, If not upanishads, BG thought at least this much common sense can be taught to sunshine, without hurting his sentiments. He weakly protested saying "If I win the lottery, I want to give 50 percent of the total amount to you". It was a lucrative deal indeed. BG started laughing loud.

Next day he called BG and informed it did not work. In fact, he never made a promise previous night and BG never did ask about the 50 percent share from the previous booty. But sunshine even now, till this day, no more demanding the boarding pass, but goes about noting down all the numbers related to his guruji, such as the number plate of the car BG travels, BG's hand phone number, sometimes a combination of all of them, for his next draw of lotto. BG can do nothing but watch helplessly.

Do you believe you got that stuff to be a lucky guru ?
Tips # 8
Tell people, how guru's grace can bring luck in one's life,
without batting your eye lid.